I AM HOPING THAT SHARING HERE WILL SHED LIGHT ON THE FACT THAT WE ARE MORE ALIKE THAN WE ARE DIFFERENT! I HAD FEW PEOPLE REQUEST PARTICULAR DATES THEREFORE, I WILL SHARE THOSE JOURNAL ENTRIES EXACTLY AS THEY READ IN MY JOURNAL. I HAVE COMMITTED TO NOT CHANGING THE WORDS TO BE TAO, Transparent, Authentic & Open. I did ask my husband’s permission before sharing this post. He says, “Okay, Fine!” lol One of my favorite bridal shower gifts came from a new friend, Rebecca. She gave us journals with a lovely note inside which instructed us how to use the journals. We write to one another whenever the urge arises and then slip the journal beneath the pillow and for the other to find. Such a great idea that I LOVE! This was the first entry in the journal on our wedding day and I had it delivered in a special bag full of “goodies” on our wedding day.
HOPE YOU READ SOMETHING THAT YOU CAN LATCH ON TO AND KNOW THAT GODLY MARRIAGES STILL EXIST! ~Sherrie Yvette
Our Wedding Day
Your life blesses me tremendously. I am so thankful for you. I plan to love you endlessly. Seriously, you are HIM! The HIM I never dreamed of because growing up I wasn’t sure a man like you could possibly exist. You are like no one I know, NO ONE, therefore you will NEVER be replaced. It’s me and you forever Honey….
“Sexy Cat” gets to be your FRIEND!
I AM HOPING THAT SHARING HERE WILL SHED LIGHT ON THE FACT THAT WE ARE MORE ALIKE THAN WE ARE DIFFERENT! I HAD FEW PEOPLE REQUEST PARTICULAR DATES THEREFORE, I WILL SHARE THOSE JOURNAL ENTRIES EXACTLY AS THEY READ IN MY JOURNAL. I HAVE COMMITTED TO NOT CHANGING THE WORDS TO BE TAO, Transparent, Authentic & Open. I’VE FOUND THAT I LIKE MYSELF BETTER WHEN I AM WHO I HAVE BEEN CREATED TO BE! EMBRACING MY PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE! HOPE YOU READ SOMETHING THAT YOU CAN LATCH ON TO! ~Sherrie Yvette
Ezekiel 2 (Read and study it)
You can’t just do what people at church want you to do. Your spirit speaks. You need not feel bad for resting or sitting to hear the word.
Don’t get so familiar with BAD that you don’t see, hear or recognize GOOD! Pay attention.
*HEAR FROM GOD*
GOD IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL!
SO WE KNOW THAT I SHARE PERSONAL JOURNAL POST HERE ON MY WEBSITE TO SHED LIGHT ON THE FACT THAT WE ARE MORE ALIKE THAN WE ARE DIFFERENT! I HAD FEW PEOPLE REQUEST PARTICULAR DATES THEREFORE, I WILL SHARE THOSE JOURNAL ENTRIES EXACTLY AS THEY READ IN MY JOURNAL. I HAVE COMMITTED TO NOT CHANGING THE WORDS TO BE TAO, Transparent, Authentic & Open, BESIDES NO ONE REALLY LIKES A PHONY NOR DO WE GAIN ANYTHING WHEN WE CONSISTENTLY HOLD BACK WHO WE REALLY ARE WHEN NO ONE IS LOOKING. I HOPE YOU READ SOMETHING THAT YOU CAN LATCH ON TO! ~Sherrie Yvette
NOTE: I DIDN’T WRITE ANYTHING ON FEBRUARY 21ST OF THIS YEAR (I WAS PROBABLY CUDDLING (newly wed lol) or PREPPING FOR MY LITTLE’S LAST MINUTE PARTY IN “PARIS” HER BIRTHDAY IS THE 22ND OF FEBRUARY AND SORT OF A BIG DEAL FOR US). NOR DID I WRITE LAST YEAR. THESE ENTRIES ARE FROM 2013 AND ARE TIME STAMPED. READING THEM IN RETROSPECTIVE ALL I CAN SAY IS LOOK AT GOD! SHEEEESH! MY TESTIMONY INSPIRES ME! THIS WAS A YEAR AFTER SUFFERING INJURIES FROM A CAR ACCIDENT AND BEING OUT OF WORK WITHOUT PAY. ENOUGH OF MY CHIT CHAT… HERE ARE ARE THE ENTRIES (COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT ANYTHING HERE):
I love when my spirit speaks! I was asleep and there was no dream NO images. My eyes pop open and these words appear to me; no mythical voice or thunder but I know who spoke them:
“You’re digging on good, fertile ground just keep looking for me! ”
God spoke to me about you and I promise that I’m listening.
What are the WALLS in my life?
Superhero mode- feeling the need to be hero to loved ones, adult loved ones who maybe just need to realize that God is the hero and that he’s already saved them through Christ Jesus! I’m just Sherrie, I can’t be the savior anymore! It doesn’t work out well when I try! I become an imposter!
My First Love…… Non communication with such. I should just move but something always brings me back to such. Dreams mainly then I’m hung over for days!
Lack- I do recognize God as owner, controller and provider of all things but u feel this is a wall for me because its always there: always present. Lack is always on my mind because the bills have to get paid and I can’t seem to manage them right now own my own. I’m 20000 just in debt! Past due on my mortgage, lights, car loan, insurance, I can go in but I feel it’s bad and I just can’t understand why? Idk? I just try to push forward praying nothing of necessity is lost. What must I get by having to go through this. Have I not learned my lesson?
I’ve learned really that I HAVE BEEN JUSTIFIED AND BROUGHT AT A PRICE! Really that my Father has paid for me and washed me up and putting SHINE all over me. I’m shining with the blood of the lamb all on my hands! FORGIVEN!
All things come through thee o Lord!
This morning was the first time Ailani ran to me and in tears said she had a dream about me! I asked her what the dream was about and she cried, ” Mommy your medicines were gone!” I said what happened and she sobbed, ” Your medicines were gone so you had to go, I couldn’t see you anymore!” I knew she was saddened because in her dream I’d died! I immediately reminded her that mommy doesn’t take any medicines anymore and that I just pray! I said,” baby before you came in here I was praying and Jesus loves me. He loves me so much and has healed me!” As I rubbed her back and held her close I prayed and openly gave thanks in front of for the healing I have received! She’s seen me sick and having to take medicine but I NEVER told her I stopped and relied on Jesus. So in her head she thought those medicines were sustaining me and that couldnt be so far from the truth! I quit the medicines because if the doctors had it their way I’d still be in the bed sleep never fulfilling purpose! Jesus is healer! I told Ailani that I will die and she squeezed me tighter! I reminded her of what her teacher AT CHURCH whom I love dearly taught this week and the same lesson I’d taught to 35 2-5 year olds! The glorious place that has been prepared for us….HEAVEN! We talked about the majesty of the place, the fact that there’s no pain no boo boos no fear or bad dreams and the glorious lake and the trees with 12 different kinds if fruit (we love fruit) and the everlasting light that God will provide! I told her I will die but when I do she knows where ill be and ill be waiting for her and she gets to see me and our Father! The old Sherrie would have openly feared and cried with her and instilled that fear of death in her child! I’m overjoyed because this morning I passed the TEST! Thank you Lord for peace! Because Im at peace she shall be too!
TIME: 12:13am (poetry)
His voice turns me on.
An on I don’t want to go off.
Nothing similar has ever stirred up like this by such a simple tremble of the tone of the voice .
His voice turns me on.
An on I don’t want to go off.
But I turn “it” off….
Every angle is a beautiful picture.
Something real to discover at the blink of an eye.
Eyes wide open to be sure that such beauty never passes you by.
Don’t pause for the moments shall surely pass you by.
Let the moments organically flash before your eyes.
Create mental imagines to be held on to for a lifetime.
Today was a day of great thought.
Lost, grief, pain, sadness but, I breathe. I live!
With my family we arrived safely in Rhode Island and I couldn’t wait to get to the places where the water meets the land. When I arrived I experienced nothing but great peace!
I am so glad that after the GPS died that Al’ decided to drive aimlessly around the town of Warwick. Turning left off the road led us into a gorgeous town on the bay. The houses situated by the bay are amazing and the clouds were slowly turning pink (my favorite kind). I couldn’t have been more thrilled to be off the beaten path in Conimicut Point Park.
As we enjoyed the surroundings, the breeze began to whisk its way off the water on to the land and my honeys headed for the car. I couldn’t pull myself away! I stayed to savor the surroundings and I saw a couple sitting gingerly on one of the many benches in the grassy area facing the river. I immediately thought, “Relationship Goals (lol)!” They sat there, her feet dangling back and forth and his feet did the same, instead sweeping the ground each time he swayed his feet to and fro! They seemed at peace as they watched their grandson fish alone.
Immediately I wrote,
When I sat my feet dangled, but I felt confident because his touched the ground.
For I know just as long as his feet are planted firmly on the ground with his eyes toward the Heavens then I know that he’ll always be there to catch me if I should stumble or fall.
Love is quite the journey. Never a race, no one to beat or competition to master.
Husband, wife, team.
I paced back and forth trying to not allow fear to keep me from sharing in life with people. This older, seasoned couple could surely offer me great insight into the covenant of marriage (husband, wife, God at the center). I paced, Al started the car, I paced some more…. I couldn’t leave that park not sharing what I had been inspired to write after watching them do the sweet little dance with their feet as they sat on the bench looking out toward the brown and white lighthouse. So, I walked over and injected into their conversation, “Are you two from the area?” It was the only thing I could think to say to engage the couple. The wife smiled and said relatively. I explained that we were from New Jersey and decided to take a trip because we ALWAYS DRIVE SOUTH BUT NEVER NORTH! Her husband advised us to keep driving to New Hampshire because the mountains are a magnificent view. “Are you two married?” I questioned. The husband, joked “we’ve been together for a few months!” Without asking she told me they had been together for 40 years. She went on to tell me that she often got sad because she sees people getting married and they go through a few low periods and then they quit. As she spoke I listened intently because just as I thought, I knew she would provide insight into the foundation of a sturdy marriage. I told her my husband and I were just approaching 6 months of marriage. The wife, probably nearly twice my age, went on to say, “one thing I can say about marriage is that there are a lot of great moments but just as many low points and if I can tell you to do anything just hang on, especially during the low times.” Thinking intently and silently agreeing her mate said, “And communicate, you have to communicate!” Without being afraid to disagree she said, “I can’t say that I totally agree with that because even when the communication happens or goes abyss you still have to hang on!”
At this point I felt confident enough to share what they inspired me to write. I read it to them! They both smiled! She said, wow you weren’t standing there long and you wrote that. I love the fact that she shared my love for poetry! She said that she’d look me up on the internet and I graciously said goodbye and thanks for the inspiration.
Approaching the car, I felt proud of myself for sharing in life with complete strangers. It’s something that I vow to do more often. I’m glad Al’ reminded me that I packed a few copies of my book. I signed one and raced over to give it to her. I showed her the scriptures and the pages for her to journal… to write until her heart’s content!
I don’t remember exactly when Pastor Connie told us that we ought to live a fasted lifestyle. Not only did she tell us but she taught us the importance. When she said it and I realized the importance I knew I had to commit to such. Just giving up simple things to really just seek God is essential. I get off centered sometimes and really the only one to get me back in order or proper balance is my Father, God. Sometimes it doesn’t need to be this drawn out process just saying, “Lord I am going to LOG OFF this week to hear from you,” is important.
When I was at the God’s Jewels session the other day Marcy said that she couldn’t understand why she was so tense. She expressed being so tense that her face hurt because she didn’t notice that was walking around with her teeth clinched. She didn’t realize this until she took a moment to be still… to be quiet. Then she went on to share with us “jewels” that she thought about how she was busy taking images in from tv and stories/news from the radio and then processing it and sometimes being fearful because of the madness going on in the world. But if she didn’t take a moment to be still then she would’ve continued in the tense, fearful behavior thus propelling a cycle the enemy wants us to stay gripped in.
This past 21 day fast was the most difficult fast for me. I had just made potato salad and it was good and I wanted to finish eating it. I had also just restocked by favorite black bean burgers and potato bread. lol Lord knows I love bread. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahhaha! But the Daniel Fast requires me to give those things up. To be more like Daniel by refusing those “souped up” foods and only partaking in those things directly from the Earth. But honestly, the food wasn’t that big of a struggle for me during this most recent fast. There was a battle in my mind going on. The enemy had been planting seeds of confusion in my mind and wanting them to sprout in my heart. Just wanting me to be confused about what’s next for me in life. Telling me that when it’s time for me to have precious babies that I won’t be able to. Then to further perpetuate that stronghold I have been experiencing pain in my lower left side (I confess that by Jesus’ stripes I am healed). These thoughts and wanting to have clear directions on business opportunities is the reason why I felt this fast was necessary. I was desperate to hear Abba’s voice. Just wanting the thoughts, the confusion and emotional lows to STOP! It’s not that I was depressed or anything, but I am mature enough in my walk with God to know that when the enemy is trying to plants seeds of destruction in my life then it’s a must that I fast to quickly get right into the bosom of my Father, God.
So I battled through it. Rising early at 6am was what I needed to really begin to reestablish and regain the routine of seeking God daily and really letting Him have it all. I am so thankful that He never leaves me and always listens to me never calling me too emotional or bossy or dumb for feeling a certain way.
What do I want to remember from this time of fasting and prayer with God:
1. War on your knees; talking too much or mulling things over in your mind is futile.
2. Don’t be afraid to take Dominion over things in this Earth. Take advantage of the opportunities that God places in my path.
3. Confess only what God says!
4. Be lovable; don’t reject the love in my home.
5. Tear down mental strongholds immediately.
6. Allow the scriptures to be my foundations, not doctor’s reports, friend’s advices or generational curses.
7. Too much idle time leads to laziness.
8. Keep my Earthly body in shape for what’s to come!
9. Hold my tongue; seek God first.
10. God, my Husband, me….
The day after this fast I woke with such joy in my heart. That night I slept peacefully and dreamt of a beautiful little brown-skinned being with tight rippled curls and plumped, juicy lips that remind me of the ones I love to kiss daily. God is so good to me. He faithfully gives me the desires of my heart!
*MY PASTOR IS AMAZING AND A GOD SEND. HER NAME IS PASTOR CONSTANCE MCLEAN AND THE NAME OF OUR CHURCH IS LIVING FAITH CHRISTIAN CENTER LOCATED AT 2323 ROUTE 73 IN PENNSUAKEN NEW JERSEY. THERE ARE SERVICES EACH SUNDAY AT 8:30 AND 11:30 AND A MIDWEEK SERVICE AT 7PM. THERE’S A HEALING EXPLOSION ON THE LAST WED. OF EACH MONTH. I SAY THIS TO PERSONALLY INVITE YOU TO JOIN ME. WE ALSO HAVE A CHILDREN’S MINISTRY FOR CHILDREN TO LEARN THE WORD OF GOD ON THEIR LEVEL. I HAVE SERVED IN THIS MINISTRY FOR 5 YEARS FAITHFULLY.
Today was super hot. I felt like I was in the desert! lol The HOT one! I shouldn’t have ignored the groaning, moaning and hollering of the fan to my heater/air conditioner in my car for 6 months because now it’s summer and it’s BROKEN. I was so hot driving home I forgot where I was! lol I was thinking someone needs to lay hands on this AC for a quick healing! lol FIX IT JESUS!
But today was a good day! I woke up and got on the prayer line and we prayed for men. I only stayed on the 21 day fast prayer line for about 30 minutes today because I was led to hang up and go back upstairs and talk to and be with MY MAN. It’s always necessary for me to make myself clear. I never want anyone to be guessing about how I feel or my position or stance about something. More importantly, effective communication is key. So I am trying my best to be a willing participant in effective communication with everyone in my life. I don’t want to leave anything important left unsaid or anyone to misinterpret my actions or words. It’s such a powerful experience for us to hold hands and pray. We agreed that we need to do this multiple times a day. I remember when we were dating we would pray each time we left each other’s presence. We have such strong foundation and being deliberate in this marriage is important. I have to always be praying for my man and warring for him. If he needs anything, he’s needs a praying wife. Everything else, sex, food, touches, clean laundry,or me looking fabulous is secondary. He needs his wife to be praying.
BOW POW! I thinks some women have it twisted. I know my husband admires me because I am physically beautiful and he’s throughly attracted to me but, when he’s had his worse day or the enemy is on his back my looks will do him no good! My spirit has to be right and mind in the correct place to be his helpmeet.
After we prayed this morning for men, on my way to work I saw a man walking down the side of the road carrying a white, plastic grocery bag with his head hanging. I drove slow because I just wanted a closer look. I saw him stoop down and pick something up. He then lit it and then tossed it to the side and kept moving. He was scavenging for cigarette butts thrown out by passer-bys. I immediately began to pray in my heavenly language. Because it was just a clear visual for what our men, the ones created to be leaders of families were up against. SOME WALKING AIMLESSLY SEARCHING, TAKING AND ACCEPTING WHAT THE ENEMY OFFERS.
Warring for our men NOT TICKLING THEIR FANCIES.
Worshipping with our men NOT GIVING TEMPORARY GRATIFICATION.
Holding hands and praying with our men NOT CUTTING THEM DOWN WITH OUR WORDS.
Speaking life to our men NOT bribing them with our BOOTAY (lol)!
Praying for our men, praying for our men, praying for our men, praying for our men that they take their rightful place behind The Father.
Hugging my Hubby NOT pushing him away.
Serving my Hubby NOT giving way to idleness.
Welcoming him when he gets home NOT letting him unlock the door with his key when I hear him trying to open the door (girl you know you’re wrong lol)!
Eye contact when Hubby is speaking NOT scrolling the social media sites.
Listening NOT waiting for my turn to speak.
Pray for my man, pray for my man, pray for my man, pray for my man, pray for my man, pray for my man, being deliberate so he stays in his rightful place.
Thank Abba for loving discipline!
My arms are suuuuuuuper sore! My workout on Monday night was REAL. I thought it was going to be 30 minutes as usual and it turns out that my workout program with Gilad, Bodies in Motion ended up being the 1 hour workout and I couldn’t tap out because my super, athletic, gymnast daughter was watching and I would NEVER here the end of it. So I worked it ouuuuuuut! lol
Gilad is my BOY! We go wayyyyy back! lol In my head this is! But anyway, Gilad had me doing some type of Taebo moves and while he was commanding us to jab, uppercut, hook in that succession I got ANGRY. I imagined that I was beating down the enemy with my fist for the turmoil he was trying to stir up in my surroundings. For the past 2 weeks I have been experiencing pain (in Jesus name I am healed), MY SISTER WAS RAN OVER BY AN ENTIRE SUV (by the protection and grace of God she survived this accident), my building principal came in and told me that I had to pack my entire classroom only to move into the exact classroom just directly across the hall (which makes no sense at all) and not to mention that I’ve been trying to find balance with the TONS of laundry and dishes being newly wed and a mommy brings! lol So I was jabbing, uppercutting, and hooking the mess out of the devil (so I thought). But man I got tired by the 3 rep. lol Sheesh! I was slowly jabbing, uppercutting and hooking the devil then and by the time those sets were over a spectator may have said that I LOST because I was moving SLOOOOOOOOWLY! lmbo
Tonight I am glad Pastor Connie reminded me not to fight my spiritually battles in the natural sense. She said that the Lord is NOT going to give you a physical grenade (or uppercuts and jabs for that matter lol) and say, “here use this.” Instead He has equipped us for war. She always reminded us that, “THE NAME OF JESUS IS, IN FACT A GOOD ENOUGH WEAPON!” I need to dig deep within myself and whip out my warring artillery:
~ THE NAME OF JESUS
So my sore arms this week will be a reminder that I lose if I try to fight the enemy in the natural realms. I’ll be losing all day! I can’t do this on my own. Pastor Connie made an awesome point, like literally AWEsome; she said, “God does NOT say, YOU CAN DO IT, He always says, I AM WITH YOU!”
When you get it wrong…
When you find that your more broken than you think….
When fear grips you in your emotions…
When frustration peaks…
When you don’t know how to fix what you’ve broken…
Go to Christ!
First praising Him and with willingness to give Him your heart first.
Sherrie there’s a lot to be thankful for!
FEAR is the opposite of FAITH!
FAITH over FEAR; FAITH over FEAR!
I went for my pelvis ultrasound today and I glanced at the screen and she had 3 files labeled fibroids. My nosey self shouldn’t have been peaking at the screen when I was suppose to be undressing. lol I shouldn’t play doctor! I don’t know why that was on the screen or what it meant so I shouldn’t allow fear to breed. Instead, I should keep faith and stand firm on the prayers that have gone forth by the prayer warriors on this fast with me.
I will confess only what The Lord has promised me even when the doctors give the REAL RESULTS, knowing that God has the final say.
I’ve heard the saying, “If Momma ain’t happy, then no ones happy!” It’s true! Ugh; so very true! I will not reject the love in my home because fear is trying to creep in. I will not curl into a ball, instead I will stand firm! I will rebuke any negative thought, plan or attempt the enemy thinks he has on my life!
It’s not that I will be ok…
I AM OK!
*WORSHIP SONG BY LAUREN DAIGLE IS IT! SHIFTED MY ENTIRE PERSPECTIVE AND PUT ME IN A PLACE OF WORSHIP.
If He went down to Hell and beat down the Devil, it’s quite simple; I WIN!
1 Revelations1:17-18 “Don’t fear: I am First, I am Last, I’m Alive. I died, but I came to life, and my life is now forever. See these keys in my hand? They open and lock Death’s doors, they open and lock Hell’s gates.